just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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