I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
