This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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