That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Buhtt sex?
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize
