I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
