I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
