one might say we're banned from that church
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize