Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
