Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
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