that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
