Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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