Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Randomize
