Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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