Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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