Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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