my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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