My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
