Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
