i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
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