Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
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