its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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