Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
