so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
