Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
