I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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