Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
