Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
my mouth tastes like poor choices
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
