i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
