You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
how do you play pong handcuffed?
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
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