By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
