The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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