he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I just gift wrapped bread.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize
