So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
