She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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