Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
FUCK WHALES
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
