Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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