I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Randomize
