Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize
