Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
