it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
