I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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