Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
