i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
