Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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