Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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