why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
