What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
