Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
