Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
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