I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Randomize
